The Betrayal of Agent DiNardo
by My Whole Life Is Thunder
Summary: After a year and a half in Paris, Tony returns to find things have changed quite a bit. Suddenly an outsider in his own family. Tony is also dealing with Senior being back to his old tricks and the brave new world of a entering a long term relationship for the first time since Tali entered his life.
1. Chapter 1

Tony ducked as the bottle flew over his head. He looked nervously down the hall, praying that Tali would stay in her room. Of course she stayed. Senior had knocked her around before. Tony hated himself for getting her mixed up with his father. He should have known that Senior would slip back

into his old ways. He had kicked Senior out of the house the first time Tony saw bruises on Tali's face. Senior had left but Senior was like a bad penny. He just kept coming back. Two weeks had passed since the day Tony kicked Senior out. He was busy packing up and preparing to move back to America.

The move back to America had nothing to do with Senior. His lease was up and it was just time. Paris had been amazing. He would definitely consider returning one day but there was so much going on at home. He kicked himself for missing McGee's wedding and swore he would be there when his Probie became a daddy. Jimmy and Breena had decided it was time to add to the family and were once again pursuing adoption. Abby was toying with the idea of leaving NCIS. Vance was starting to date again. Gibbs and Ducky were getting older. So much was changing. Tony just wanted to return to his family. He just prayed that they would be able to help him.

Senior's latest rampage was lasting longer than any of the more recent ones. The last time a rampage lasted this long Tony woke up in a hospital bed with a uniform for Rhode Island Military Academy hanging on the door. Tony was older and stronger now but he still could not fight back against Senior. The old bastard was a powerful one.

"You not gonna fight? Ya always were weak." Senior slurred.

It was becoming painfully clear that Tony could not just hide. He went for Senior's knee. Old bastard had a trick knee it was his first weak spot. Tony kicked Senior's leg out from under him. Senior rose in a daze. For a second Tony thought that he was safe. The next thing he knew Senior was going for his throat. Tony grabbed Senior's arm. They continued to shove and kick each other. Eventually Senior got the upper hand. He shoved Tony to the ground and kicked him repeatedly in the legs and back. Tony closed his eyes and laid still.

"Coward" Senior scoffed.

Tony woke the next morning in a great deal of pain. Most of his wounds were defensive wounds. That was the good news. His back was killing him. He forced himself up and drug himself to the kitchen. He put on a pot of coffee and then stumbled to the fridge. Bacon and eggs today. Simple enough but they were Tali's favorite breakfast. Once breakfast was on he made his way down the hall to Tali's room.

"Tali it's time to get up." Tony said weakly.

"Are you OK, Aba?" Tali asked.

"Fine" Tony lied.

"How did you get hurt?" Tony asked.

"I fell" Tony lied.

"Oh" Tali replied.

"Don't worry I am going to be OK. Come on let's get a start on breakfast. It is out last day to pack before the movers come." Tony explained.

"How are they going to get a truck on the ocean?" Tali asked, studying the toy globe on her desk.

"Out stuff is coming on a boat." Tony explained.

"Gibbs' boat?" Tali asked.

"No a big boat. It is called a barge." Tony explained.

"Are we going on the boat?" Tali asked.

"No we are going on a plane." Tony laughed.

Tali was such a smart girl. Tony knew he could not keep the truth from her for very long. He wished that Senior would stay away but knew better. He had made the mistake of letting Senior back into his life. Every time he let Senior back in, it got harder to get rid of him. He wished that he was half as smart as Tali. At least smart enough to stop falling for the routine. He knew that Senior was an old dog who would never learn new tricks. Senior would forever abuse and torment his son. The more Tony hoped and prayed that it would stop. The worse that the abuse would become. He knew it was no use trying to hide. Senior would find him, would find them. At least Tony would be back with his family soon.

The boxes were packed and the movers were due to arrive early the next morning. Tony learned from the night before and locked his front door. He his apartment was in a safe area but there was no safe when Senior was around. The bastard could even charm Gibbs. Night had fallen and Tony sat on the window seat and stared up at the moon. He thanked God that he was safe for the night. He prayed the safety would last. He prayed that even if he were harmed. That Senior would remain above harming his sweet Tali.

The sun brought a new day once again. Tony was thankful for a safe night. Breakfast their last morning in France was the last of the Cheerios in disposable bowls. Tali went on and on about moving. Most children were terrified of the idea of moving and having to make new friends. Tali not so much. His girl was a social butterfly. She loved meeting new people and made a new friend everywhere she went.

"Will Tori be my friend?" Tali asked.

"You guys got along when Uncle Jimmy and Aunt Breena visited this summer." Tony recalled.

"Yeah we did but that was just a visit." Tali commented.

"Tori is more shy. The fact that she played with you at all is a good sign." Tony assured.

"OK" Tali replied.

"Will McGee's babies play with me?" Tali asked.

"Not for a while." Tony laughed.

* * *

 **A/N: How will the others react to Tony's return? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	2. Home Again

Tali did better on the flight to America than she had the first time Tony traveled with her. This was her fourth flight and she was older this time. She giggled and smiled. Tony even rented headphones for here when they showed a kiddie movie. It was late at night when the plane finally touched down in DC and Tali had fallen asleep. Tony prayed that would bode well as far as her adjusting to the time change. He picked her up and carried her off the plane. Struggling to balance his carry on and Tali's limp form. Tony searched through the crowd and soon found the person who had come for him. The one person who knew he was returning to the states.

"Tony!" Jimmy called.

"Thanks again. Sorry it's so late." Tony apologized.

"It's alright" Jimmy assured.

"Feels good to be back." Tony commented.

"Here let me take that." Jimmy said grabbing Tony's bag off the carousel.

"Thanks" Tony replied.

"No trouble" Jimmy replied.

"How are the girls?" Tony asked.

"They are good. Breena is taking a writing class and Tori is working on potty training." Jimmy explained.

"Good for both of them. Hopefully Tori is as easy to train as Tali. I was worried especially with all she had been through but she had it down in less than a month." Tony explained.

"It's been an uphill battle with Tori." Jimmy sighed.

"She's still young. Tali was nearly three by the time I got her. I think Ziva was working with her before... too." Tony explained.

"Tony, Tori is almost three." Jimmy reminded.

"Seems like just yesterday she was born." Tony recalled.

"You're tell me." Jimmy sighed.

The drive back to Jimmy's house was pretty uneventful. It was late and the city was dark but from what Tony could tell not much had changed. Jimmy's yard and house were different from the last time. A playhouse was set up in the yard and toys were scattered around on the floor. Tony had to catch his breath when he saw the latest pictures of Tali. She had grown so much just since the Palmer's visit to Paris in July.

"She's grown so much." Tony commented.

"So has Tali" Jimmy replied.

"Hey thanks for letting us stay here. I have a couple leads on houses but I couldn't get a good perspective from Paris." Tony explained.

"Hey it's no problem" Jimmy replied.

Tony awoke the next morning in a daze. It took several moments for it to register where he was. When he finally came to, another panic took over his body. Where was Tali? He had tucked her into the other bed the night before. Now she was gone. In a panic he pulled himself out of bed and stumbled into the Palmer's kitchen. Breena was at the table feeding Tori and Tali their breakfast.

"Aba!" Tali cried.

"Good morning Tony. Did you sleep well?" Breena asked.

"Pretty well. What time is it?" Tony asked.

"Seven thirty, you just missed Jimmy. He wanted to wait but it was seven and you showed no signs of waking. So he headed off and I got Tali fed when she woke up." Breena explained.

"Sorry" Tony apologized.

"Don't be you had a long flight. I am surprised that you woke this early." Breena explained

"I have to be at NCIS by nine. I am taking Tali with me. I am just going to meet Vance about my new job." Tony explained.

Tony was proud to be returning to NCIS. Even though his field agent days were long since behind him. He would still play a role in the field and in bringing up new agents. His new role at NCIS would be training incoming agents at FLETC. There would be no more crime scenes. These agents were not even Probies yet. Any scenes he went to would be mock scenes. No more talking to risky suspects. He would only be teaching the new agents how to evaluate scenes, how to question, how to interrogate. They would spend six weeks with him. Those who made the cut. It would be few. Some would be unable to handle the intensity of the career. Others would not fit the standards of NCIS. Those that made it would be the incoming Probies.

"I am thrilled to have you back on board." Vance said as he shook Tony's hand.

"I am glad to be back." Tony replied.

"Can I come in now?" Tali asked from the doorway.

"Yes, Tali the business is over." Tony assured.

"Uncle Vance!" Tali squealed.

"My little Tali! How are you?" Vance asked.

"Good I am four now! I had a princess party!" Tali cried.

"I saw your daddy made a very pretty princess." Vance laughed.

"I can't believe I posted those pictures." Tony sighed.

"The princess you hired got sick and you stepped up to take her place. I would have done the same thing." Vance reminded.

"That girl is my world." Tony replied.'

"I know" Vance confirmed.

"I just wish that Ziva was still here." Tony sighed.

"I do too but you are doing a great job on your own." Vance assured.

Tony left Tali with her Uncle Vance. While he went down to the squad room. He could not believe that he was about to be reunited with his former teammates. After two years apart. He was about to be reunited with his former family. He just hoped that Jimmy had not spoiled the big surprise. He could not wait to see their faces. After everything McGee and Gibbs had been through they would be more than welcoming of a happy surprise. At least that's what Tony was telling himself. The elevator door slid open and there they were.

"Your eyes do not deceive you!" Tony cried.

"I am glad to see you are still arrogant." McGee commented.

"Did Jimmy tell you I was coming back." Tony replied.

"Jimmy hasn't been up here in days." Bishop replied.

"So why didn't you get excited? I mean I am back. After almost two years." Tony reminded.

"You came back from a vacation on the dime of your dead baby mama. Did you really expect the hero's welcome Agents McGee and Gibbs received after spending months being tortured. As I recall they contacted you but you couldn't be bothered." A new man commented.

"I...I just couldn't." Tony stammered.

"We got out just fine no thanks to you. By the way I risked my ass for you more times than I can count but hey why should you return the favor." Gibbs scoffed.

"I wasn't expecting a hero's welcome. I just wanted to be welcomed back." Tony replied, struggling to hide his hurt.

"Some people need to stay gone." Gibbs snapped.

* * *

 **AN: Will Tony ever be welcomed back? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	3. Reaction

The reaction hurt Tony. He certainly was not expecting a hero's welcome. He was barely even expecting the others to be surprised. Jimmy Palmer wasn't exactly great at keeping secrets. What he was expecting was a warm welcome. He was expecting them to be thrilled he had returned. They had not talked much but Tony thought he mattered more than he did but he did not. He did not matter to any of them. They hated him. For reasons they had literally no idea about.

"So how did they react?" Jimmy asked as Tony stepped into autopsy.

"Apparently I am arrogant and a terrible person for not helping with Gibbs and McGee." Tony replied.

"They do know you were retired, right?" Jimmy questioned.

"I thought but the new guy said I was vacationing on Ziva's dime." Tony replied.

"I wouldn't call raising a child on your own vacationing." Jimmy scoffed.

"Nor was it on Ziva's dime. I used her money to get to Tel Aviv and Paris. I used it while I was looking for work but most of the time we were scraping by on my waiter salary." Tony explained.

"Believe me I know." Jimmy replied.

"So who is that new guy?" Tony asked.

"Craig Ford he was the only Probie, Gibbs did not scare off. In fact they got along right away. McGee liked him too and Bishop well they get along great. Me I don't know. He's a little too intense for my liking." Jimmy explained.

"How long has he been here?" Tony asked.

"A year last week." Jimmy replied.

"Do Abby and Ducky know I am back?" Tony asked.

"Not even them. They are down in Abby's lab." Jimmy replied.

Tony was far less enthusiastic about the second reunion. Ducky might be OK but Abby. If McGee and Gibbs hated him. Abby would certainly follow suit. The elevator dinged and the door slid open. Tony walked through the lobby and into Abby's lab. He could feel the rage before he even saw her face.

"YOU!" Abby cried.

"What?" Tony asked.

"I cannot believe you! Cannot believe you!" Abby snapped.

"First of all I..." Tony started.

"Vance begged you to come back but you flat out refused! Gibbs and Timmy were suffering in a hell hole! While you were living it up in Paris! Then when they finally escape! No thanks to you! You don't even call for three weeks! What kind of example are you setting for Tali!" Abby ranted.

Yes it was true that McGee and Gibbs were home for three weeks before Tony contacted Gibbs or McGee but that was not Tony's fault. Ziva's cousin had died unexpectedly. Tony and Tali were in Israel sitting Shiva when Gibbs and McGee returned. Tony did not even know they were back until nine days later. The second week Tali and him were both down with a nasty flu bug. Both ended up in the hospital for a night. Tony did not want to unload his personal drama on McGee and Gibbs, but he had told Vance. The director was supposed to pass the information on. Then again Vance was a busy man. The others were not answering his calls. Now he knew why. He just wished he knew how to correct everything.

Ducky had not said anything outright but Tony knew by the brief glance that things would not be pleasant between them either. Tony rode the elevator up to the squad room. He wasn't sure why he was going back there. None of them wanted to see him. The door slid open and Tony approached the bullpen. The others were gathered around McGee's computer watching a video. Bishop had her hand shoved down Craig's pants. Kind of hinky given that Gibbs was right there.

"Rule Twelve!" Tony cried.

"Excuse me?" Bishop questioned.

"You are breaking rule twelve." Tony replied.

"Actually rule twelve does not exist anymore. I stopped it." Gibbs declared.

"Did Paraguay put things in perspective?" Tony questioned.

"I ended rule twelve months before Paraguay. Craig and Bishop were so happy together. I had to let them be." Gibbs explained.

"Why didn't you let me and Ziva date?" Tony asked.

"Because not everything is about you." Gibbs replied.

"Right hey what are you watching?" Tony asked.

"We are video chatting with Delilah." McGee replied coldly.

"Hey there Delilah. Are you in New York City?" Tony joked.

"She is actually in the hospital. She went into early labor. They stopped it but she has to stay in the hospital until our babies are born." McGee explained.

"I am sorry. I didn't know." Tony apologized.

"Well you don't know a lot." McGee scoffed.

"Good luck, Delilah" Tony said before rushing from the room once again.

Tony threw himself down onto the Palmer's guest bed. Tali was next to him. He could not believe the things that she had seen. He ached for her. He hated himself for being so weak. He let his father walk all over him and now the team.

"Aba sad?" Tali asked.

"Aba sad" Tony confirmed.

"Why?" Tali asked.

"I guess I was not as close to my friends as I thought." Tony explained.

"Why?" Tali asked.

"Sometimes grownups. Sometimes they just grow apart and do things wrong." Tony explained.

"Will that happen to Tori and me?" Tali asked.

"I hope not Tali but if it does. Just know that I will always love you." Tony assured.

"I'll always love you too." Tali promised.

"I know" Tony whispered.

Tony would always have Tali. At least there was that much. He would always have her and she would always have him. They would have each other. Deep down he knew that she was all that he needed. She was his daughter and his world. Though there was one other person he prayed would stick by his side for the long haul. His phone rang and no surprise she was calling.

"Hello Tony"

"Hello Emily"

* * *

 **A/N: Who is Emily and what is she to Tony? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	4. The Phone Call

Tony and Emily had been going out for ten months now. Though they had been friends for over a year. Jimmy and Breena had first introduced the couple. The Palmer's new Emily and her first husband through an adoption support group. Emily and her husband Stan had opted to adopt due to two of Stan's brother dying from Juvenile Huntington's Disease. Stan himself was not affected but carried the gene. Not wanting to risk inflicting such a horrible disease on his children and not wanting to take the risk of IVF the couple chose adoption. Stan had been killed in a car accident about six months before Ziva was killed. At the time the couple was planning their second adoption. Two weeks after Stan's death Emily had learned that they had been selected by a woman who was four months pregnant with the child who would be Emily's second son. Emily informed the mother that her husband had died and thus she would be unable to adopt the baby. There were no official rules about single parents adopting from the agency. So the mother said if she could handle it. Emily could still adopt her son. Emily chose to proceed with the adoption and five months later her son was born. At the time of his death. Emily and Stan had been saving up to move to Paris for a year. Through generous donations Emily was able to make the trip. Emily and Tony ended up moving to Paris within four days of each other. Emily had a degree in French and a teaching degree and was able to land a job at an American School. It was a year long stint and when it was over Emily decided to return to her old life. With her two sons. Emily was back to teaching but she was also writing a book about the past two years the rough title was "Choosing To Live".

Emily was a true inspiration and yet she chose Tony. Days like today Tony both thrived on that and hurt by it. He thrived because it meant that he may not be the monster his so called family claimed him to be. He hurt by it because if the others and Senior were right and he was a monster. Then he in no way deserved a woman like Emily.

"Tony?"

"Yeah"

"Is our connection bad? I asked how your day went almost two minutes ago and you have not said a word."

"Sorry I was just thinking."

"You sound upset. It didn't go well did it?"

"It was pretty rough."

"I am sorry to hear that what happened?"

"Long story short everything changed while I was gone. The guy who replaced me. I don't know he seems like a dick. Oh and get this he is dating Bishop and has been publicly for almost a year."

"I thought your old boss didn't allow that."

"He did away with it when he saw how perfect they were together."

"Why didn't he see that with you and Ziva? You guys seemed very much in love."

"I don't know and I don't dare ask. They all hate me. All of them."

"Why? How? You have been gone over a year."

"Because I didn't come back to save McGee and Gibbs from Paraguay."

"Paraguay?! Jesus Christ! Just because those two men were stupid enough to stay behind in a dangerous situation. I heard that Vance guys interview. It was clear they made the choice to stay. I am not saying the deserved what happened but there is no way you needed to risk your life for them."

"I wish they could see that but they don't even understand that I am am all that Tali has. Without me she is an orphan. I would not do that to her."

"You shouldn't be asked to."

"I can't talk about this anymore. How is the book coming?"

"The publisher wants ten chapters by the first of the year. I am at five."

"Well that's half way there."

"It took me four months to get five. Now I have just over one to squeeze out another five."

"Well if you ever need me to take the boys. Just let me know."

"I am sending them to my parents this weekend. I will join them Thursday for Thanksgiving. They will stay another night and I will pick them up Friday."

"Oh"

"You know you are invited right?"

"I am?"

"Of course I know my dad came on strong but it was just over a year after Stan's death. He was worried I was just latching onto the first man who came along. I'd feel the same way if god forbid one of my boys were in that situation."

"I'd be the same with Tali."

"Does anybody besides Jimmy know about us?"

"No and I don't dare tell them. Not after today."

"Tony listen to me. They may have shoved you out but it was their loss."

"Except I don't have a family."

"Tony. Listen to me. You have a family."

"Yeah I have Tali! I have Tali and I am failing her."

"Tony you are not failing her. For the past year and a half you have ate, slept, and breathed for Tali. You have devoted your life to that girl. When I first met you in Paris she was a scared and vulnerable child. She cried at the drop of a hat and had to sleep practically on top of you. Now she is strong and independent. She laughs easier and more than she cried before. She sleeps on her own and has not had a nightmare in weeks. That is all you."

"Still I wish that she had the family I promised her. I promised her that she would play with McGee's twins and that Grandpa Gibbs would bounce her on his knee. That Bishop would cook for her and Abby would do her makeup. Ducky was going to tell her stories. Instead everybody just seems to hate me and they don't care about her."

"Like I said that is their loss. They are being petty and it is costing them two great people. Truth be told I feel worse for them than you. You got away from clearly toxic people. They cut out a great man and the most wonderful little girl I have ever known."

* * *

 **A/N: What do you think of Emily? Is she good for Tony? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	5. MTAC

The next few days were pretty rough on Tony. He gave up on the house near Gibbs' place and settled to rent an apartment near where Jimmy and Breena were living. The rent was cheaper and the complex did have a nice playground for Tali and each unit had a small backyard. It wasn't Tony's first choice but he didn't have the means to buy a house at the moment. He would be able to if he moved in with Emily but they weren't ready for that at the time. So the apartment it was.

The house hunt was the easiest part of Tony's first days back in America. Raising Tali on his own had not been easy. It was even harder now that he did not have the support he had been counting on. He had been counting on his NCIS family eagerly stepping up to help him raise Tali. Instead he had been basically abandoned.

It was hard to move forward but Tony knew it was necessary. Emily was right he was better off without them. Still he was hurting knowing all that he had lost. It was hard coming into work every day and being treated as a stranger or worse a monster. Jimmy and Vance were always kind to him but they did not have much time for him. Jimmy was working more now that Ducky was feeling his age and Vance was the director. Most of the time Tony was just alone. Alone and depressed.

Tony shifted his feet. He eyed the Probies who stood before them. Five recruits to the agency. Three males and two females. They had started out as eight but three had already walked out. Apparently that was about average. You lost one to three once the amount of work was made known. The good news was that there was a good chance all five would make it. Unless they were traumatized by something they saw or something happened that turned them against Tony. Which unfortunately was painfully likely. Tony's biggest fear was one of the team vilifying Tony to his Probies and that they would abandon him. If Tony lost enough Probies to his character. He would lose his new position.

"Are you OK Agent DiNozzo?" Agent Taylor asked.

"Let's get started. I want ten laps around the building. Start with some warms up exercises and then run laps. After that we will take twenty for water." Tony declared.

"YES SIR!" The agents cried in unison.

Tony took a swig from his coffee as the last Probie rounded the building. Ten laps, five agents, about an hour and a half. Not bad given the size of the grounds and the fact that while Tony promised a water break after. He insisted the Probies stop every second lap for a water break. Tony had run too but had to stop and speak with Vance after the fifth lap.

"Well done team let's take a water, cool down break then I want to do some sparring in the gym until lunch. After lunch we will run a mock case. Just gear grabbing and getting to the vehicles for today. We will wrap at three." Tony declared.

Tony's Probies were great in the ring. His best was Katie. She was young just out of college and she was tough. She left a couple serious bruises on Tony and he did not go easy on her. She was going to go far in the agency. Tony smiled as he watched her chow down on a burger and fries in the cafeteria. He did not have any romantic feelings towards her. She was far too young for his tastes but she reminded him of another Kate he knew. His first partner and best friend from his early years at NCIS. Year two to year four. She had been his best friend. He wondered how she would have felt about all this. He wondered if she would have hated him like the rest of the team.

"Uh Agent DiNozzo?" Katie called as she threw away her lunch.

"Everything OK?" Tony asked raising his eyebrow.

"Can we talk uh after the others have gone?" Katie asked.

"I have to get Tali from school by three thirty or they will send her to the daycare center, but I can talk for a couple minutes." Tony replied.

"Oh it can wait." Katie replied.

"Katie if this is important. It needs to come out." Tony insisted.

The rest of the day went off without a hitch. The best day Tony had, had for a long time. All five agents did great with their exercises. Cara the second female agent fell behind a bit but Tony was cutting her a little slack. She had a newborn at home. Taylor, Lucas, and Atticus all did better than they had the previous day. Probably not wanting to be one upped by Katie. Tony couldn't say he was thrilled by sexism but they were not rude to Katie and whatever it took to get the agents to give their all. Tony just wanted the agents to do their best. After dismissing the other agents Tony escorted Katie to autopsy. Jimmy and Ducky were out at the moment and Tony felt it was a safer choice for a Probie than the elevator.

"You needed to talk." Tony commented.

"Yes sir" Katie replied.

"Is their a problem with me or one of the other Probies?" Tony asked.

"No sir everybody is great." Katie replied.

"Then what is going on?" Tony asked.

"Did you ever work with an agent Kaitlin Madeline Todd?" Katie asked.

"Yes she was my partner for two years. Why do you ask?" Tony replied.

"She was my aunt. My father Matthew Todd is her eldest brother." Katie replied.

"I knew you reminded me of somebody." Tony gasped.

"Kate was my favorite aunt. She is the reason I joined NCIS." Katie replied.

"How did your family feel about you joining NCIS?" Tony asked.

"They were all furious with me. They said that I would get killed. That if I didn't change my mind I was out of the family. They could not go through that again. Everybody except my Aunt Rachel that is. She is the only one who cares. I am staying with her right now." Katie explained.

"It can be hard for families to accept such a choice. I hope they come around but if they don't we are a family here." Tony explained.

"Thank you Tony." Katie replied.

* * *

 **A/N: How will Tony handle having Kate's niece on his team? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	6. First Day

Tony helped Tali button her shirt and tie her shoes. She pretty much had the skills down but sometimes she got over excited and would miss buttons and forget the bunny ears on her shoes. Today was a day she would be sure to get too excited and it was also a day Tony wanted to ensure she looked great today. Today was Tali's first official day of preschool. She would be attending the same preschool as Tori Palmer. It was a mixed class between three and four year olds but Tali was still a couple months older than the rest of her class. Tali was smart enough to be in the regular four year old class but after everything she had been through. Tony wanted her to be in the easier class.

"Do I look pretty?" Tali asked.

"You look very, very beautiful." Tony replied.

"Thank you Daddy!" Tali cried.

Tony had arranged for his Probies in training to come in a little later that day. So that he could drop Tali off at school. On the way out the door Tony gave Tali a sign announcing that it was her first day of school. He took several pictures of her before loading her into her car seat and driving her towards the school. It was almost impossible for Tony not to break down crying as he made the drive. He was so proud of his daughter but it was hard to see her growing up so fast. What was hardest was making another memory that Ziva would not be present for. Another reminder that she was gone and he would never see her again.

"Cocoon Academy! That's my school!" Tali cried pointing to the sign and pulling Tony from his trance.

"Why yes it is. Did you read that by yourself?" Tony asked.

"Yeah!" Tali cried.

"You sure are smart." Tony gasped.

"Thank you!" Tali cried.

"Maybe next year I will get you into the gifted kindergarten. I want to see how you cope first." Tony explained.

"Kindergartners get presents?" Tali asked.

"No. Gifted is a fancy grown up word for being good at school. AKA probably already smarter than daddy." Tony laughed.

"That's a let down." Tali sighed.

Tony could not help but laugh at Tali's comment. For the most part she took after Ziva. She shared her looks and her brains. She was tough and strong like Ziva. Really the only thing she got from Tony was his sense of humor. Tony loved that girl. He really did. He turned into the parking lot and parked in the closest space he could find. He helped Tali out of the car and grabbed her backpack from the backseat. He took her hand and walked with her through the front door. The first stop was the office. He filled out the emergency contact form, signed a few other forms, and verified the information he had given when he first enrolled her.

"Peanuts and tree nuts are the only known allergies?" Janet asked.

"Yes she gets a small rash from foods with high acidity but the pediatrician assured me it is a sensitivity and not an allergy." Tony explained.

"She has an epipen?" Janet asked.

"She has one and I have a second one to leave with her teacher." Tony replied.

"All classrooms, the cafeteria, and the nurses office have epipens. All staff and any volunteers are required training in administering an epipen." Janet explained.

"Whew" Tony breathed.

"We had a close call a few years ago and now we take allergies very seriously. All Preschool and kindergarten rooms are strictly nut free due to allergy risk. Each grade level of the upper grades have a an allergy safe room and we have a separate cafeteria for children with allergies." Janet explained.

"Good to know" Tony replied.

After finishing up at the office Tony walked Tali back to her classroom. Knowing that the school took Tali's allergies very seriously comforted Tony. Of course there were still about a million other things for Tony to worry about. Everything from Tali being targeted by one of his enemies to her not having any friends. He came to Mrs. Rochelle's room. Upon arriving he handed Mrs. Rochelle the yellow copies of the forms had had just signed at the office. While making sure the white copies were secured in his brief case. He had a similar conversation with Mrs. Rochelle about Tali's allergies. Before turning to leave. He took one last look and saw Tali happily playing with Tori and a couple other girls. Tony's heart sped up and he had to leave the room when a small boy joined the group and began playing almost exclusively with Tali. His daughter certainly was a social butterfly. She got that from both of her parents.

Tony left the school knowing that Tali was in good hands and excited to hear the stories she told that afternoon. Cocoon had after school care until four and then Breena would pick her up. Though Tony was hoping to be able to leave early and pick his daughter up after her first day. Upon arriving at NCIS Tony was greeted by director Vance.

"Everything OK, Director?" Tony asked.

"Everything is great. I was just heading out to give a talk to Jared's history class. While I have you. How did the drop off go?" Vance asked.

"Oh it went great. The school is very secure and conscious of allergies and other medical issues. Tali seems so happy. She has already made a couple friends." Tony explained.

"Always good to hear. Well you best get upstairs. Your agents are waiting." Vance replied.

The peace Tony had felt since leaving the school was quickly ripped away. Part of training was introducing the future Probies to the Lead and SFA's from each team. Tony had intentionally saved Team Gibbs for last. He was dreading what would come when he made the big introduction. The meeting went OK but as Tony and the future Probies headed for the elevator he heard Craig whisper loudly that he "Could not believe they let such an impofessional bully train incoming agents." It took all Tony had not to turn back and go off on his replacement.

* * *

 **A/N: Will Tony be able to prove himself to his former team? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	7. Okay

Thanksgiving was actually good. Tony enjoyed his time with Emily and the boys. He loved getting to know her family and Tali was thrilled to play with the boys again. Life was good for a brief moment in time and Tony was thoroughly enjoying himself.

Monday was back to reality. Back to the new life Tony had forced himself into. Work was still going well. Still enjoying training the Probies and they were still responding well. Work was OK, as long as he only interacted with the Probies, Vance, and Jimmy. Unfortunately that was not as easy as it sounded.

The Probies were having lunch and after lunch they were meeting with Vance. Tony was a little nervous because they were giving him an oral report on Tony's performance. Tony had not slept much the night before he was so worried by everything. He knew it was ridiculous to be scared of Probies but he worried that the others had said something. He worried that the Probies would fall into the bad thoughts. Tony could not afford to lose this job. He could not put Tali through that. He had put he through enough.

While the Probies were talking to Vance, Tony wandered over to the cafeteria. He wasn't very hungry but he needed something. He jingled the change in his pocket. He had enough on him for a bag of chips and a can of soda. Not the most nutritious lunch but about all his stomach could handle. He shoved a few quarters into the vending machine and selected a bag of pizza flavored combos. They were at the table closest to him. Pretending that he was not there.

"You know the Probies he is training are talking to Leon. Right now." Gibbs declared.

"About what?" McGee asked.

"Performance review." Craig replied.

"Can we offer input?" McGee asked rubbing one of his scars.

"If Vance cared about your scars Tony would not have a job right now." Craig reminded.

"To think I treated him like a son." Gibbs scoffed.

Tony grabbed his chips and paid for a can of coke. He exited the cafeteria and headed down to the most private area he could find. He was learning to not let the abuse get to him. They were acting like middle schoolers. He needed to be the bigger person and not be broken by their behavior. They were just petty and immature. No sense letting them ruin his life. He looked at his watch. It was late and he figured he may as well just dismiss the Probies for the day. He headed up to MTAC. All the Probies were waiting for him besides Carla.

"You are all dismissed." Tony declared.

"Are you sure?" Katie asked.

"I am sure. Have a good night." Tony insisted.

The Probies left, there was still some time before Tony had to get Tali. He wondered where Carla had gone. She had seemed strange all morning and now she was gone. Tony was sure that meant that they had gotten to her. It didn't help he had called her Cara for the first week he had known her and that he had not let her use being a mom as an excuse.

"Good afternoon, Tony." Vance greeted.

"Oh hey" Tony replied.

"I can't give details but I heard glowing reviews." Vance replied.

"Great" Tony replied.

"You may have noticed that Carla was not present this afternoon." Vance commented.

"Yeah is she OK?" Tony asked.

"She is fine but she is no longer a member of your team." Vance replied.

"Did I do something wrong?" Tony asked.

"No it has nothing to do with you. Her husband was offered a position at the Navy college. They will be moving to Chicago next week. Carla will continue training in Chicago." Vance explained.

It was weird knowing that Carla was leaving but Tony was glad that her husband had been given a good position. He was grateful for the time with her and sad to see her go. At least he still had three Probies left to train. Just a few more weeks and then more would be joining. It was a seemingly endless cycle. That had only just begun.

Tony pulled into the Palmer's driveway. He saw the girls playing on the lawn. So happy and full of life and joy. He wished that he could trade place with them. He wished that he could enjoy the happiness that they had. He wished that he could be young and free again. Sighing he climbed out of the car and walked over to where the girls played.

"Aba!" Tali cried.

"Baby girl! How was your day?" Tony asked.

"Great! I can count to ten!" Tali cried.

"Tali you have been able to count to ten as long as I have known you." Tony laughed.

"Now I can count in Spanish!" Tali declared.

"You can?" Tony asked.

"Si" Tali replied.

"Go ahead and show me what you got." Tony instructed.

"Uno, Dos, Tres, Cuatro, Cinco, Seis, Siete, Ocho, Nueve, Diez" Tali recited.

"That is impressive. It took me years to learn that much." Tony laughed.

Tony was glad to know his girl was doing well. He was glad that at least she was happy. He would endure this hell for fourteen years if meant that his girl could be happy. Tali's happiness was all that mattered to him. She was his world. He would do anything for her.

"Abba still sad?" Tali asked.

"Yes" Tony replied.

"Why?" Tali asked.

"It is a long story." Tony replied.

"How long?" Tali asked.

"Very" Tony replied.

That night Tony was lying awake. It was a good day and Tony was sure that the other shoe was going to drop soon. He was sure that everything was about to fall apart again. Why? Because he knew how those people were. They were horrible and they did not care about him. That was painful but what could he do? He had to just learn to tough it out.

* * *

 **A/N: Tali is a very smart girl. How long until she catches on to Tony's problems? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	8. Love

Things were going OK at work. Tony was doing his best to avoid them. He really didn't have much business in the bullpen. He was mainly down in the gym or up at FLETC. His time with his current Probies was coming to an end. He would have a three week break and then a fresh batch would come. At least that had been the plan. After it became apparent the issues with Team Gibbs and Abby would not just go away. He began considering leaving the agency again. He was looking into physical education jobs. He kept his certificate active and took continuing education classes every year or two. He figured phys. Ed would make a good fall back. He had also applied for a couple private security positions. The main thing he wanted was to be able to accommodate Tali. He wanted time with her either in the afternoon on on weekends. He wanted guaranteed vacation time for her. He wanted holidays off. FLETC gave him those things but it brought too many challenges. Then again he could avoid them.

Jimmy had gone to visit Breena for lunch. He needed to get out of the office and away from everything. For the most part Ducky was quiet on the Tony front. Though Jimmy knew he was not thrilled with Tony. Today was one of the days where Ducky made his true feelings known. Almost painfully clear. Jimmy just could not take anymore. So when it came time for his lunch break he went to meet with Breena.

"How are things going with Tony?" Breena asked.

"Not great. Ducky was ranting against him all day. That's part of why I joined you." Jimmy explained.

"How is Tony handling this?" Breena asked.

"Brave face but I know he is looking for other work." Jimmy explained.

"Vance isn't doing anything?" Breena asked.

"Vance is going out of his way to looking out for Tony but nothing anybody has done is fireable. They are allowed to have opinions and they haven't gone too far. Yet." Jimmy explained.

"That's too bad. Hopefully things will work out soon." Breena sighed.

"Me too." Jimmy replied.

That afternoon Tony got off work. He was going to pick Tali up from daycare and then meet Emily and the boys at the park. Even if things were going great at NCIS spending time with Tali, and Emily and the boys would still be the highlight of his day. They were the best things in his life. Tali was his baby girl, Emily was the first woman he had loved since Ziva, and he loved the boys as his own.

"How was your day?" Emily asked as she approached Tony and Tali.

"Alright" Tony replied.

"Anymore trouble?" Emily asked.

"No but I really don't want to talk about things around Tali." Tony replied.

"Sorry" Emily apologized.

Tony and Emily sat on a nearby bench and watched the children play. For a brief moment Tony was able to forget his troubles. Emily just had this way about her. Something about her gave him peace and relief. She made him feel a way he had not felt for a long time. When she was around his pain seemed to disappear. Even days when the harassment was severe. Emily could always make him feel better.

"My parents really liked you." Emily commented.

"They did?" Tony asked.

"Very much. In fact they invited us back for Christmas." Emily replied.

"So are we going?" Tony asked.

"Of course we are. I am almost done with my book. So I was thinking if you could get off. We could stay until New Years. The boys are out the nineteenth through the third." Emily explained.

"Tali too. I think FLETC is off the same time. At least Christmas through New Years." Tony explained.

"Great" Emily replied.

Tony was looking forward to the upcoming vacation. He could use a couple of days away from everything. A week would be even better. Emily's parents only lived forty five minutes away. Even if he had to work. He could still stay with them and just drive out in the morning. He could probably get around giving his Probies shortened days that week. If they were even working that week. After so many years of never having holidays off. He had gotten used to just preparing to work. He was having trouble adjusting to making note of a calendar.

Tony needed to stop by the grocery store on the way home. Normally he would let Tali walk but it was around dinner time and two weeks until Christmas. The store was crowded and customers were moody and careless. He loaded Tali into the cart's child seat. He promised her a candy bar if she was good and sat still.

"What do you want for dinner?" Tony asked.

"Pizza!" Tali cried.

"Me too but we had pizza last night. What is plan B?" Tony asked.

"Chicken!" Tali cried.

"It's late for me to make a chicken but we can get a rotisserie chicken and some rice and vegetables. What kind of veggies do you want?" Tony asked placing a chicken in the cart.

"Not broccoli." Tali laughed.

"How about green beans, peas, corn, and carrots?" Tony suggested.

"Alright" Tali replied.

Tony collected the rest of the groceries and pushed the cart up to the checkout lane. He noticed that the cashier looked familiar. He racked his brain trying to figure out who she was. Eventually it was his turn. He took out his wallet as the girl rang up his groceries. He stuck his card in the reader and eyed the name tag "EMILY F."

"Is your father named Tobias?" Tony asked.

"Shouldn't you know that?" Emily laughed.

"I guess I should." Tony replied.

"So are you back or just visiting for the holidays?" Emily asked.

"I am back. Weren't you at some fancy boarding school?" Tony asked.

"I moved back for Senior year. My dad seemed lonely." Emily replied.

"That was nice of you." Tony replied.

"I missed home." Emily admitted.

"Me too." Tony replied.

"Are you glad to be back?" Emily asked.

"Not really." Tony sighed.

"Why?" Emily asked.

"People I thought were my friends turned out to be jackasses." Tony admitted.

"You too?" Emily asked.

"Afraid so." Tony sighed taking his last bag.

"Call my dad! Tell him you are back!" Emily called as Tony walked away.

* * *

 **A/N: How will Fornell react to Tony being back? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	9. Christmas

Christmas was a welcome distraction. Emily's parents lived in a nice neighborhood. It was mostly young families and elderly couples. Emily's parents fit the second category. Though now that he was in his forties. Tony had trouble accepting sixty eight and seventy as elderly. At this point of his life they were middle aged. Maybe because he was not yet ready to admit that he was middle aged. Forty eight years old. When did he get so old? Though at the same time he felt as if he had aged a thousand years in the past two. Especially in the past few months.

"My dad said it might snow tonight!" Emily cried twirling around.

"I take it you are excited." Tony laughed.

"I guess I never got over a Christmas snow." Emily replied.

"I do love it when it snows on Christmas." Tony agreed.

"My Aunt Cynthia had Down Syndrome and a few other problems. She just adored snow especially at Christmas. Every winter my grandparents would send her up from Georgia where they retired. She would wake up the neighborhood every time it snowed. Every Christmas she would try to make Frosty. Of course as a kid I adored it. Then I became a mean teenager and told her Frosty wasn't real. I was grounded for months thanks to that one." Emily recalled.

"You don't have a mean bone in your body." Tony laughed.

"I did when I was fourteen." Emily replied.

"Cynthia died ten years ago. She was so sick that last Christmas but she got out in the snow anyway. I hadn't built a snow man in years. I went to college in South Florida. So I didn't get many opportunities but I did for Cynthia. I guess I owed her. Now I build one every year and try to turn him into Frosty. The boys love it now but I know one day they will think I am nuts." Emily explained.

"That sounds like a great tradition and I know the boys will appreciate it just like you do." Tony replied.

"Did your family really have no traditions?" Emily asked.

"Not since my grandfather died. Though we didn't have many before. At least not after my mom died. Even if we had. I don't know. I couldn't have gotten into it." Tony explained.

"Well we are going to start traditions." Emily promised.

Tony watched the snow fall out the window. He was in a whole different world right now. He was imagining Emily building Frosty with Cynthia and her siblings. He imagined Emily doing it with the boys. This year Tali and him would join them. Maybe in a couple years their would be one or two more little ones out there. Then one day their would be the kids romantic partners and eventually grandchildren. For the first time in his life Tony was a part of a family. A real family. He had thought he had a family with NCIS but had since learned that was a lie. They were not his family. Just his co-workers. People he barely knew at all.

"Don't waste your time thinking about them. Tonight is too nice." Emily insisted.

"I just thought that they were my family." Tony sighed.

"The cruelest people will do that to you." Emily replied.

"You are right. That part of my life is over you, Tali, and the boys are my life now." Tony replied.

The big Christmas Eve tradition for Emily's family was going to midnight mass. Tony had not been to a midnight mass since college. He was trying to get in touch with his faith at the time. He didn't get much out of the service. His friend bailed on him and his girlfriend had dumped him about a week before. This time was different. He was actually serious about being there. Not just trying to make himself look good or whatever he had been trying to achieve back in those days. It was nice to sit in the middle of the pew with Emily by his side. In between a row of siblings and siblings in law. People he prayed would soon be his own family.

"And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the World Should be taxed." The Priest read.

It was Emily's turn to make sure everything was ready Christmas morning. Tony stayed up to help her. Before going to bed they ate the cookies and drank the milk. They took the note meant for Santa and replaced it with a thank you note for the children. That was the fun part. The hard part was dragging the exciting gifts down from the attic. The gifts that made it under the tree were clothes and the boring educational toys.

"How long did you believe in Santa?" Emily asked.

"Until I was eight." Tony replied.

"What made you stop believing?" Emily asked.

"My mom died. The year before I only wanted her to get better." Tony explained.

"Now I feel bad for being so bitter that I caught on that Santa had the same bad left hand writing my dad had the year he broke his wrist." Emily sighed.

"Don't feel bad. I am just being a sad sack." Tony sighed.

"Don't say that. You had a rough childhood." Emily insisted.

"It could have been worse. At least that's what Abby always told me. Abby and Gibbs. McGee really everybody. Not Ziva even though I know things were worse for her." Tony explained.

"Don't waste your time on them." Emily insisted.

"Yeah you're right. Well we should get to bed. I have a feeling we will be woken up early." Tony decided.

"You are absolutely right." Emily replied.

The next morning the children ran around ripping paper off of gifts and showing off their new toys. Tony beamed with pride as Tali helped Tyler get his new toy police car's siren to go off. Tyler's older brother Charlie returned the favor by helping Tali ride the big girl bicycle she had received. For a brief moment everything was perfect.

* * *

 **A/N: Tony will talk to Fornell soon but I really wanted to do the Christmas chapter. New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	10. Back to Reality

The second day of the new year brought Tony back to reality. Tali and him stayed with Emily's parents until the Friday after Christmas. They spent the weekend and New Year's Day together watching movies and lounging around the house. New Year's Day was bitter because Tony knew what he was facing. He put a smile on for Tali but knew she saw through it. Sometimes having a precocious child was painful. New Year's night he tucked Tali into bed and poured himself a drink. An expensive bottle of scotch he had intended on giving to Gibbs for Christmas. That wasn't going to happen. He had offered it to Emily's parents but they did not drink hard liquor. He brought it home "for special occasions." Today was not a special occasion but he needed one last hurrah before returning to reality.

The first thing Tony did the morning after holiday was bring Tali back to school. She dressed in the blue and purple outfit she had received for Christmas. Tali was smiling the entire ride going on and on about how excited she was to see her friends again. Tony wished that he could feel that way again. He wished he had more friends than Palmer and Vance. Upon arriving to the school he saw a sign inviting parents to join students in the auditorium for a welcome back assembly. Tony called Vance who said he could be a little late. Tony sat with a few other parents in the back of the auditorium. The assembly started with a few of the older children reading reports about what they had done over their break. One child had gone to Australia and bragged about getting to swim on Christmas Day. Another student was officially adopted by her foster family. After the speeches the principal gave a talk about starting a new year and how the school year may be half over but it was also a new beginning. A begging in the middle of the story.

"I just want to close with a message for everyone. This is a new year. Go out and enjoy it. Maybe you will have a fresh start, maybe you still face the same battles but it is a new year. You made it. Welcome back Polar Bears!" Principal Clarke declared.

Principal Clarke's speech left Tony feeling renewed. He knew that things would not magically change for him. He knew that Gibbs and co. were still going to be unwelcoming and cruel, but he also knew he was in control. He was not going to let them get him down. They were no longer a part of his life. No need to let them ruin it.

Tony turned into his parking space. This was the start of a new batch of Pre Probies. This time there would be six incoming agents under his charge. He swallowed hard knowing what was to come. He prayed they were like the last batch but feared they would be brain washed by Team Gibbs. He exited the car and headed inside. The Probies were standing in a line in FLETC. This time it was two woman and four men.

"Good morning I am agent DiNozzo." Tony greeted.

"Why were you late?!" One of the woman spat.

"I had to drop my daughter off at school." Tony explained.

"While you were dropping your daughter off lives were being lost!" One of the men snapped.

"I will have you know I am a single father. My daughter's mother was killed two years ago. I am all my daughter has. So yes I took her to school and stayed for an assembly. Lives were not lost because of me being tardy. You are first day agents in training. You have not even probationary agents yet. Today is mainly going to be paper work and going over what to expect." Tony explained.

"Yes but if we were in the field." The male agent rebutted.

"Putting Tali first is why I am not in the field." Tony reminded.

"I am getting the director." The female hissed.

Tony swallowed hard. He did not even know his new agent's names yet and things were already off to a bad start. So much for a better year. Tony thought back to the "HELP WANTED" sign that hung on the door of the nearby Burger King. Working at a fast food joint couldn't be any worse than this. It would pay the bills at least.

"What seems to be the problem here?" Vance asked entering the room.

"I told you! Agent DiNozzo was over an hour late and then he was extremely rude to Don. He does not seem to care about the lives of the men and women in the navy." The female agent explained.

"Joanne I told you that Agent DiNozzo would be late. I gave you preliminary paperwork to do in the meantime. Agent DiNozzo cares very deeply about folks in the Navy. He is right in saying that you will not be saving lives today and if you continue with this attitude you will not be inducted into my agency." Vance explained.

"Would you be this understanding if one of us were late?" Don questioned.

"If you had a valid reason." Vance replied.

The day did not get better from there. The end result was a meeting between Tony, Don, Joanne, and the director. The pair were on thin ice. Which only made things worse for Tony. He had heard Gibbs talking about how immature he was. He wished that he could stand up for himself to Gibbs the way that he could to the Probies. He wished that he could put this nightmare behind him. He picked Tali up from daycare and then headed to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Emily was on when he arrived but was clocking out by the time he got to the line. He loaded Tali into the car and made it home before realizing he left the bag of potatoes at the register. He couldn't exactly make baked potatoes without potatoes. He called the store and lucky for him the cashier had noticed and left the bag at customer service. Tony reloaded Tali into the car and drove back to the store. He was tired and briefly considered just ordering a pizza and making the potatoes tomorrow. He arrived to the store and was glad that he returned. It was starting to rain and Emily was standing over her open hood. The manager from the auto parts store next door was beside her.

"What's wrong?" Tony asked.

"Joe thinks it's my transmission." Emily replied solemnly.

"That's rough." Tony sighed.

"My dad is in the hospital and my boyfriend oh excuse me ex boyfriend is out with one of my mom's friends. Out out." Emily sobbed.

"What's wrong with your dad?" Tony asked.

"He just had a minor procedure on his hip. He is going to be fine but they have to keep him overnight. I don't know what I am going to do. I told him I could handle myself." Emily explained.

"I will give you a ride home. Are you still at the same house?" Tony asked.

"Yes but you don't have to. I can catch the bus." Emily sobbed.

"The bus stop is almost two miles from here and it is pouring almost freezing rain. I cannot let you walk." Tony explained.

* * *

 **A/N: Tony talks to Fornell in the next chapter. New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	11. New Offer

Tony knew he would eventually get a bad batch of Probies, he just prayed it would not happen so soon. He was only in his second group of Probies and he was already in hell. The agents he was supposed to train did not trust him. Trust was the thing most needed to have an effective team. Deep down Tony knew the Probies trusted everybody besides him. He knew that as the number of people who knew about Paraguay grew. Things would only get worse for him. More Probies would not trust him, they would not learn from him, and sooner or later. It would cost a life. Tony did not care much for Team Gibbs or these new Probies, but he did not want families to suffer. A dead or seriously injured agent meant a shattered family. No family deserved that.

"Did you hear me, Mr. DiNozzo?" Emily asked.

"No, what?" Tony replied suddenly pulled from his thoughts.

"Do you mind if we go see my dad in the hospital?" Emily questioned.

"I don't see any problem with that. I am going to have to stay with Tali though." Tony explained.

"I've been alone with worse." Emily laughed sadly.

"Maybe I can leave Tali with somebody." Tony offered.

Tony took Tali to the cafeteria for a snack while Emily went to see her dad. Tobias was in good shape and they were expecting him to come home the following day. Tony figured that he could leave Tali with Big Emily as he guessed she would have to be and go to see Tobias. While they waited he downed four cups of coffee and Tali happily nibbled on a piece of pizza. She pulled the cheese until it strung out and smiled. Not the best public behavior but Tony could not help but laugh.

"Welcome back to the states DiNutso! Did you get deported?" Fornell called.

"Just wanted to move back." Tony replied dryly.

"You lose your sense of humor over there?" Fornell asked.

"Something like that." Tony replied.

"Emily take Tali to the gift shop. By her a stuffed animal on Uncle Tobias." Fornell said handing Emily a crisp twenty dollar bill.

"Where did you?" Emily asked.

"Wheelchair pocket." Fornell laughed.

Emily took Tali's hand and the pair scampered off towards the gift shop. Tony went for coffee number five and then returned to his seat. Tobias wheeled himself over to the vending machine. He put his dollar in the slot and started to select a soda but changed to a bottle of water after getting the stink eye from a nurse. Tobias groaned and went for his sixth cup. Fornell moved the cup to the other side of the table. Tony went to reach for the cup but Fornell slapped his hand away. Tony wanted to put up more of a fight but his heart was racing. Six, eight ounce cups of coffee in forty minutes were probably just a little too much.

"Turning into Jethro?" Fornell asked.

"Don't bring that man up." Tony snapped.

"What happened?" Fornell asked.

"He blames me for Paraguay. McGee blames me, Ducky blames me, Abby blames me, Bishop blames me, everybody but Jimmy and Emily blame me." Tony explained.

"You talked to Emily about Paraguay? I know you've seen her at work but that isn't appropriate work talk." Fornell commented.

"My girlfriend is also named Emily." Tony laughed.

"Ah. So why are you being blamed? You weren't even an agent when McGee and Jethro were abducted." Fornell asked.

"I didn't come back." Tony replied.

"Did Vance ask you to come back or be available?" Fornell asked.

"No I mean he asked me to offer input when I could but for the most part they needed active agents on the case." Tony explained.

"As you'd want." Fornell replied.

"Now I have Probies against me. Vance is trying to help but he can only do so much." Tony replied.

"Probies? Are you back with NCIS?" Fornell questioned.

"FLETC but I am probably going to leave. Things are just too tense there." Tony explained.

"How would you feel about joining the FBI?" Fornell asked.

"I can't do field work anymore." Tony replied.

"We have positions that don't require field work. You could train our incoming agents. All federal agencies go through essentially the same training." Fornell explained.

"Paraguay" Tony started.

"They only knew Gibbs and McGee. Maybe a few other essential agents but you would be off radar for that case to the world." Fornell assured.

"I am an old man." Tony added.

"So am I and I say that you need to come. We could use a Tony DiNutso sorry DiNozzo." Fornell insisted.

"I'll mull it over." Tony replied.

"Alright Mr. Fornell we need you back in your room." The nurse declared.

"Yes Prudence" Fornell sighed.

"My names Jillian" Jillian laughed not sure what Fornell was talking about.

"You are still valuable to some of us!" Fornell called back.

Fornell's offer danced around Tony's head all night. He had to admit it would be better than what he was doing. Even if he ended up doing the same thing with the FBI he was currently doing with NCIS. It would be better than where he was. NCIS had become toxic. FBI would certainly be better than flipping burgers or whatever menial job he ended up with, to provide for Tali. She deserved better than what he was bringing on his own. Than what he would give her if he ended up going to some minimum wage job, just because he could not handle life. He picked up his phone and called Big Emily. Her phone rang once and then went straight to voicemail. She must have gone to bed already. Taking a deep breath he went ahead and left her a message.

" _Hey Emily, it's Tony. I hope I didn't wake you. Uh when you get this call me back. I have something a need to float by you. Kind of a major life choice actually."_

* * *

 **A/N: What will Tony decide? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	12. The Decision

Tony had to admit Fornell's offer was tempting. The FBI was similar to NCIS and all federal agencies had the same training. If he took the job he could just go through an abbreviated form of training and have the job in a matter of weeks. He would be doing the exact same thing but in a more stable environment. Fornell had assured that he would for the most part be able to work the hours Tali was in school. There would be days he had to go in at six but Emily was only taking three classes on campus and could mind Tali for a couple hours on those days.

Breaking the news to Jimmy was the hardest part about Tony's decision. Jimmy had been so exited to be working together again. Their houses were walking distances from each other and their daughters went to the same school. It's not like they wouldn't see each other but there was something special about working together. Sharing the same stories and woes. Maybe the woe thing was inaccurate. Jimmy didn't seem to be enduring any abuse.

"So what do you think?" Tony asked.

"Well if the pay is similar and you would be able to work around Tali. I don't see any problem." Jimmy replied.

"You aren't mad?" Tony asked.

"Why would he be mad?" Breena asked as she entered the room.

"Because I am leaving NCIS." Tony replied.

"Tony working with you again has been great. I would not trade the past few weeks for anything but NCIS has become toxic. I am not even sure I want to stay." Jimmy explained.

"You want me to see if Fornell has any positions available for you?" Tony offered.

"He was considering working for my dad." Breena replied.

"Right" Tony sighed.

"Some of the FBI guys are pretty cool." Fornell recalled.

"Except for Slacks who would just eat up the Paraguay thing." Tony sighed.

"Sacks isn't with the FBI anymore." Jimmy replied.

"He's not?" Tony asked.

"No apparently Fornell and him had a huge falling out when Fornell came back from medical leave. Things got close to violent. Sacks claims he quit but rumor is he was fired." Jimmy explained.

Sacks was gone and Jimmy was understanding. Really there was nothing standing in Tony's way. Besides his own fear that is. Sure Sacks was gone and he got along well with the other FBI guys he knew. Nobody he would be working with new the Paraguay story. Still he had his doubts. What if the word spread? What if more people knew than Tobias had let on? What if Sacks had just resigned and came back? It was all too much for Tony to handle.

"What's wrong, Abba?" Tali asked.

"I'm just thinking." Tony replied telling a half truth.

The next step was breaking the news to Vance. Tony's biggest concern with telling the director was that Vance would think he was weak. He worried Vance would see Tony taking the new position as running away from his problems. Then again maybe that's what he was doing. Would he ever consider working for the FBI, if NCIS were not so toxic? Or was this just his way of escaping? The truth is he had no answers. Maybe he just needed a change but maybe he was weak.

"The FBI, huh?" Vance questioned.

"Yes Fornell offered me the job yesterday." Tony replied.

"Well I would definitely miss you but this is a great opportunity." Vance explained.

"You don't think I am running away?" Tony asked.

"Well are you?" Vance questioned.

"I don't know." Tony admitted.

"Running from a bully is not always a sign of weakness. Sometimes it is the only way to preserve your sanity and safety." Vance explained.

"What does that teach, Tali?" Tony asked.

"That you are strong. Some people are not worth the fight." Vance explained.

Tony had approval from Vance but he was still on the fence. There was one person he had not talked it over with and she was probably the most important person. Emily and him were just dating but she had the right to provide input. If they were to get married this would be the man she married. Did she want to marry a man who fought through constant hell at NCIS or a weak man who ran away from all of his problems?

"My only concern is that this Fornell is friends with Gibbs." Emily commented.

"Apparently they are not as close as they once were. Fornell did not know about Paraguay and Gibbs did not even know about his surgery." Tony explained.

"Is Fornell at least professional?" Emily asked.

"More than Gibbs. Not that, that's saying very much." Tony explained.

"As long as you are sure it's not going to be more of the same I say go for it." Emily replied.

"That's what everybody is saying." Tony sighed.

"Then why so many doubts?" Emily asked.

"Because I thought returning to NCIS was the right decision." Tony confessed.

Tony had finally admitted the truth. He was not worried about his friend being angry, his boss finding him weak, his girlfriend not approving. His worry was that he did not have good radar. That any choice he made would in fact be the wrong choice. He could not take any more heart break. This would be one of the hardest decisions he ever had to make. It should be easy but nothing was easy anymore. Not even easy decisions.

"Have you decided anything?" Fornell asked.

"No" Tony replied.

"What's the hold up?" Fornell asked.

"I don't know." Tony replied.

"Want me to try a trick that always worked on Emily?" Fornell asked.

"Can't hurt." Tony sighed.

"Make a decision right now. I cannot help you but if you do not decide in the next five minutes we are leaving and you won't get either toy." Fornell declared.

"What?" Tony laughed.

"Sorry I guess it doesn't always work." Fornell replied.

"I'll do it." Tony announced finally getting the idea.

* * *

 **A/N: Did Tony make the right choice? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	13. Nerves

Even though Fornell had promised him a job. Tony still had to go through the standard process. He had an interview and then there would be a background check. It would be at least a month. One more month at NCIS. He would be teaching these Probies until the end. He wished that he could just walk away but he needed the money. Besides what if things did not work out with the FBI? What if he did not get the job? He would be stuck. He did not want to put Tali through that. So he did what he had to. He stayed strong or tried to anyway.

Tony thought that the interview went well. Due to their previous friendship Fornell could not be the one to interview Tony. Instead Tony was interviewed by some other agent. The troupeish tough as nails female agent. She took no nonsense. Tony was scared to death the entire time. He kept tripping over words and swearing that he had said the wrong thing. At the end of the interviewed Quinn shook his hand and said good job. Tony prayed that meant "Good Job" and not "Yeah this is not going to happen." He hoped that he would be able to break free from NCIS.

The night after the interview Tony had a date with Emily. The first time seeing each other since Tony decided to leave NCIS. Over the phone she had said that he was making the right choice. When they talked on the phone Tony had given the impression he could just walk in to the job. That was how Fornell had made it sound. Now that he had actually begun the process. He had no idea what he was supposed to do.

"How did it go?" Emily asked.

"I don't know." Tony replied.

"How can you not know? You said the interview was just a formality?" Emily questioned.

"Fornell could not interview me because we were friends. I was interviewed by Agent Quinn." Tony explained.

"What did he think of you?" Emily asked.

"She" Tony replied.

"What did she think of you?" Emily asked.

"I don't know. I was a disaster but then she said good job. Then again I don't know what good job really means." Tony explained.

"It means good job. You will be fine." Emily assured.

"I hope so." Tony sighed.

Tony tried to convince himself that Emily was right. He tried to convince himself that he would have the job and that he would start a better life. He knew that positive thinking was the key to success. He also knew that nothing was guaranteed. Fornell could not actually keep the promise that he had made. There was a chance that Tony had not done well enough in the interview, or that he had done fine but he was not qualified. He had years as an agent and as a detective. He had years in this business but was years of experience really enough?

Tony wanted to call Fornell. He desperately wanted to take the easy way out and just demand an immediate answer. Would that come across as desperate? Of course it would? Would his desperation take points away from him? His hands were shaking and he had Fornell's number pulled up on his phone. His hand trembled as he held his finger over the screen. Did he dare press call. No. bad move. No bad move. Too late he had pressed dial. He tried desperately to hang up but it was too late.

"Tony?"

"Fornell"

"Are you OK?"

"Did I... Did I... Did I..."

"Did you what?"

"Never mind."

"Tony what is going on?"

Tony had really blown it this time. He was just sure that he had screwed up. He had to have. There was no way that Fornell or anybody would take him seriously now. They would just see him as a big old spazz. Because that's what he was a spazz. Seriously how pathetic? Calling Fornell and stuttering like the female lead in a crappy romance movie. There was no way a man like him would qualify for a job with the FBI. He picked up his phone and googled "Jobs near me." A burger flipper was better than nothing. Surely he would not screw that one up. There was no way he was that big of a failure. Right?

Fornell stared at his phone utterly bewildered. Tony had called him that was not that strange. What was strange was how he had stuttered and panicked. Was something wrong? Was Tony in trouble some how? The agent only wished that he could rush to Tony's side. He could not drive for another couple weeks at least. He considered waking Emily but she had an opening shift the next day. He did the only thing he could. Call Tony back. When the younger man did not answer. He left a message.

"Hey Tony, are you good? You sounded freaked out? Is Tali OK? Do you need me to come over? It's late now. I am going to call back in the morning. If you do not answer then I am going to send somebody over to see you. Call me back if you get this soon. These pain killers are keeping me up. Be safe, bye."

Tony played Fornell's message back. The concern was there but there was nothing about the job. Granted Fornell either did not or could not say anything. Still Tony wanted answers. He desperately wanted answers. He wanted to know what his future would hold. Fornell said that he would call back in the morning. If Tony did not answer he was going to send somebody over. That sealed the deal. Fornell thought Tony was nuts. There was no way that he had the job now. He had cost himself a great opportunity. He had cost Tali promise. He was such an idiot.

"Idiot!" Tony screamed thrusting his phone across the room.

* * *

 **A/N: Will Fornell be able to talk Tony around? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	14. You've Changed

Tony hated that he was feeling this way. He made a jackass out of himself on the phone with Fornell. Then he had called Vance and said he could not come in the next week. He said he just needed some time. How pathetic was that? "He just needed some time." It made him sound like a teenager too scared to say the words breakup. This was kind of a breakup though. Breaking up with his job, with his old life. How did he move on from his life of nearly twenty years?

Fornell dialed Tony's number. It rang once and then went straight to voicemail. That was enough to make the older man worried. He knew Tony had a home phone but he could not think of the number off hand. He rolled over to the side table and searched for the phone book. Before remembering that he had tossed it to Emily to clean up the mess when she spilled oil in the driveway. He called upstairs but remembered that she had an opening shift and had left over an hour before. He frantically searched through his contacts for somebody who may be able to get a hold of Tony.

Tony pulled himself together before Tali woke. He had a long shower and changed into comfortable clothes. Before Tali woke he put two Jimmy Dean breakfast bowls into the microwave. He had planed on making a bigger breakfast but he just couldn't. He was lucky to have pulled together this much. He heard tiny feet racing down the stairs and forced a smile on his face.

"Good morning! Abba!" Tali cried.

"Good morning, Tali." Tony replied.

"What's for breakfast?" Tali asked.

"Just a microwave breakfast bowl." Tony replied.

"Sounds good!" Tali cried.

"You are always so happy." Tony commented.

Tony wished that he could be like Tali. He wished that he could feel the constant joy and thrill that she felt, but knew he never could. Tali lived in a world of joy and delight because she was three. Tali was precocious but still innocent. She was always happy because she was loved and safe. One day Tali would know how cruel the world was. Knowing that broke his heart even further. Knowing that one day Tali may have similar bullies and demons to his own. Knowing that her bullies and demons may be worse.

Vance was awakened by Fornell's phone call. He groaned and prayed that it was not something that would force him to the office. He had promised to spend the afternoon with Jared and Kayla. They were more than used to it by now but he still prayed that he would not have to break the promise to his children.

"Hello?"

"Leon? Did I wake you?"

"Yeah but I needed to get up anyway."

"Do you need to be anywhere?"

"Not for a couple hours, why?"

"I am worried about Tony."

"Tony?"

"He called me last night. He was stuttering and seemed really freaked out. I tried calling him but he didn't pick up. This morning it went straight to voicemail."

"Did you try his landline?"

"I don't have it."

"Do you have his address?"

"Not the new one."

"Hang on I will check in on him."

Vance immediately went to check on Tony. The former agent had been acting strange recently and he did not think it was entirely because of Tony's recent treatment. Really the change had come after Ziva died and Tali came into Tony's life. Tony had many problems stemming from the loss and abrupt fatherhood. Issues he never got a chance to work on. Now all this had happened. It made sense that he had fallen apart.

Tony got Tali fed, helped her get cleaned up and dressed. They had no plans that day. Emily had an interview about her book and Jimmy had taken Tori to a birthday party. It was just going to be Tony and Tali. If the weather held up they may just go to the park. If the weather turned like they were saying it might. He knew of a kid friendly museum nearby. The doorbell rang. Tony ignored it assuming it was just somebody promoting a new religion. The ring turned to knocking which turned to violent pounding. Now Tony was worried. He left Tali upstairs and made his way to the door. Tony looked through the peephole and saw Vance on the other side. What on Earth was Vance doing here? Did he suspect Tony was faking his illness? Had something happened? Could it be the Paraguay thing was his fault somehow?

"What can I do for you?" Tony asked plastering on a fake smile.

"Are you OK?" Vance asked.

"Fine just fine. I know I shouldn't have called out but I just need some time." Tony explained.

"It's fine we all need mental health days sometimes." Vance assured.

"If you aren't mad? Why are you here?" Tony asked.

"Fornell said you left him a disturbing voicemail. Are you OK?" Vance asked.

"God I am such a dork! No way I am getting that job now." Tony sighed.

"The Tony DiNozzo I knew did not stutter or doubt himself. You have changed in the past two years. Since Ziva died." Vance explained.

"I have?" Tony questioned.

"Yes and I know why." Vance replied.

"Why?" Tony asked.

"Tony you lost Ziva in a horrible way. You barely had time to mourn her before you found out about Tali. Suddenly you are a single father, to a kid you never met. That is a lot for one man to take in. Then over the past two years you have put Tali first and devoted your life to her. You haven't properly mourned Ziva. You haven't taken in what you are going through with Tali. You just dove in to caring for Tali. Tony you need to cope." Vance explained.

"How? I am all Tali has." Tony reminded.

"I will take Tali for a couple weeks. You can get her at night if you want but I want you to take time to mourn. Just you. Mourn for Ziva. Then take Tali back and teach her about her Ima." Vance explained.

* * *

 **A/N: Will simply taking time to mourn be enough to bring Tony around? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	15. Time to Mourn

In his heart Tony knew that Vance was right. He really did need to take sometime and grieve for his loss. He had never taken the time to mourn for Ziva. He had dove straight into caring for Tali. He was eternally grateful for the distraction. If not for his littler girl, he sincerely doubted that he would be alive today. He had raised and loved Tali for nearly two years. He would continue raising her until she was grown and he would love her the rest of his days, but Vance was right. The time had come for him to mourn Ziva, to really mourn for Ziva. So here he was sitting on a park bench. For the first time since Tali came into his life, wondering what he would do next.

Her grave was across the ocean in Israel. Even if it were possible, logical to make the trek. He could not just up and leave Tali with Vance or even Emily. He could not take Tali either. That would defeat the entire purpose of mourning for her. He had come to where he apartment complex had once stood. The place where he had killed Rivken, and nearly lost his own life. The complex had been repaired after the explosion. Only to be torn down about ten months after Ziva left. The owner of the complex dropped dead and his son decided he could get more for the land. Everybody was evicted and the units demolished. Only for the son to be arrested for how he handled the selling of the property. Apparently multiple families were never informed. They just came home to find their complex torn to the ground. He went to jail, the buyer backed out. Now the lot was empty. Just like Tony's dreams.

"I miss ya, Z." Tony whispered.

It was painful being at Ziva's apartment or the lot where it had stood. Even though she had left that place months before it was torn down. Even though he followed the story on the news. Even though everything happened between her departure from America and her ultimate departure. He was still taken over by the gravity of the situation. It was nothing short of a miracle that he was able to make it home before he fell apart. He collapsed onto the ground, tears falling from his eyes.

"Ziva! Ziva! Ziva!" Tony cried he could not believe that she was really gone.

Tony ached for his devastating loss. He knew that she was gone. He had cried for it more times than he cared to remember. Yet he still somehow struggled to accept that she was gone and taking time to fully grieve was actually making it worse. He thought back to a simpler time when he was convinced that he could find her. He searched desperately. Only to receive the devastating news that the remains were in fact Ziva's. She was really gone. That was the day he first cried in front of Tali. That was the day he finally had to tell Tali that her Ima was dead. That was the day he had to give up any weakness. Because that was the day he knew forever that she was never coming back.

Night was a strange sensation. He visited Tali and ate dinner with the Vance's. Jared and Kayla were apparently find cooks, he left full and satisfied. On the way home he stopped for a case of beer. He downed one and was feeling off. He put the rest of the case in the fridge and collapsed onto the couch. Another night, another old romance he would never live out. Ziva had come to love these movies near as much as he did. "We'll always have Paris" had become their quote. They would always have Paris and because the world was cruel nothing more. That was not true. They had a child together. They had shared other times, but they would never make new memories. No matter how desperately he wished. A new wave of grief washed over him. He turned off the television and drug him back upstairs and into his bed. It was going to be a long couple weeks.

Tony did not get much sleep that night. His first night in nearly two years where he did not have Tali and he could not sleep. He tossed and turned. He cried out and begged for Ziva to come back to him. She would never come back. Finally he gave up on sleep. He took out his laptop and watched a slideshow of photographs of her. Never in his life had he missed anybody more. In that moment he desperately wished that he had not agreed to this. He did not want to mourn for Ziva. He wanted to live in the false reality he had convinced himself he did not reside. The world where there was a fragment of a chance that Ziva Elizabeth David was still alive.

Morning brought it's own pain. Tony was tired and frustrated from not getting a second of sleep. He fell asleep in the shower. Waking up only when the water was flowing into his nose and just starting to cut off his flow of oxygen. The fright gave him just enough energy to get through the shower. He desperately wanted eggs but knew cooking in his state was not the best idea. He instead settled for a cold pop tart and two bananas. He tried cutting it into little disks but ended up cutting his hand. After doing self first aide, he stumbled upstairs. He fell asleep the last thing he saw was Ziva's face.

"I love you, Z." Tony whispered to the air.

Tony woke again in the afternoon. A new day had finally begun. He ordered a pizza for lunch and wolfed down half the pie almost as soon as it arrived. He brushed his teeth and headed out of the house. A new day had begun and he wondered what he should do with his second day of mourning.

* * *

 **A/N: How will Tony spend the rest of his mourning time? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	16. Memories

The week passed by in a blur of grief. Tony spent his days visiting places Ziva had loved, places they had shared. He cried openly for her, not hiding his grief as he had been doing. With Tali safe with the Vance's there was nobody to be strong for. As the week went on, he began to notice a sense of clarity and of peace. Ziva may no longer be among the living, but she was always with him. He had mourned and now the time had come for him to move on.

Images of the farmhouse flashed on Tony's computer screen. Some saved from Google Maps, others taken while in Israel with Ziva. He wondered if the farm house still stood on Google maps or if new pictures had been taken. He knew it was a simple, ten second search but he did not have the heart to type that address into the bar. Either it would stand and be a reminder of when Ziva was alive or it would be gone just like her. For now he just reached out and stroked his fingers across the screen. He could almost touch the wood. In one of the images he could see Ziva standing at the kitchen sink. He could smell her perfume, feel her skin, hear her singing in her native Hebrew, and taste her lip stick on his own lips. It was like she was right there beside him but she was not, she was gone.

Ziva's Star of David necklace waited in his sock drawer, waited for the day Tali was big enough to wear the delicate star. He retrieved the star from it's hiding spot and cupped it in his hand. Again he could feel her presence right beside him. He felt her wrap her arms around his neck and whisper that she loved him. Before he could reply she was gone, faded away into a memory.

"I miss you, Z." Tony whispered.

The last time Ziva had visited with Tony, she had left a shirt crumpled on the bathroom floor. At that time she had said she would get it when she got back stateside. She never returned to America. He begged her but she just could not return. He yearned for her presence. He draped the shirt over his chest. He could feel her on him, in the tender act of love. That last time they were together, when unbeknownst to him Tali had been created. The greatest thing he had ever created, made with the first person he had truly loved. The woman he would do anything to save.

That night Tony prepared Ziva's favorite dinner. He recalled making it for her one night years ago. They had just wrapped a rough and emotionally shattering case, and had earned four days off. Nobody had gone home that first night. Abby and McGee had gone together "as friends" but Tony had suspected they had been more than friends that night. Gibbs and Jenny, Jimmy and Michelle. Sans a romantic partner, Ducky had spent the night at his mother's nursing home. He had of course gone over to Ziva's. She went to lie down and he prepared her favorite meal for her. She had wrinkled her nose and said "This is delicious, I am surprised." with a laugh. In Ziva's defense Tony DiNozzo wasn't exactly a guy you would expect to know how to cook. It didn't help his case that a small mountain of Chinese food containers, and pizza boxes piled on the floor.

"My cooking has improved since that first night." Tony whispered as he dished out his meal for one.

Tony stepped into the shower. In his blur of mourning he had forgotten to pick up shampoo when he was out shopping. His choices were Tali's Cheerful Cherry kiddie shampoo and the Mystic Wave shampoo Ziva had kept at his apartment for when she slept over. If his hair was going to have a feminine scent until he could get back to the store. He much preferred smelling like a woman than a little girl. He squirted the last of the mystic wave into his hand and lathered it into his hair. His mind flashed to washing her hair with that exact brand during an undercover case. Lathering the soap into her soft black hair while she sat back both arms wrapped in faux casts.

It turns out Tony had also left deodorant and coffee off of his shopping list. Pretty much knowing he could not make due with Tali's hot chocolate and the the few flakes of deodorant that remained on his current stick. He made a middle of the night trip to Walmart. He remembered one night just before everything happened with Eli and Jackie. They were spraying his building for silver fish and Ziva had invited him to crash at her place. Gleefully he accepted, with it being a weekend and they were "Will theying" at the time. He was hoping for a little fun. No such luck Ziva ended up laid up with a hormonal migraine. Instead of creating the beast with two backs, he drove to Walmart for headache medicine and lady supplies. He handed Ziva the bag and made some idiotic comment. He ended up knocking on Gibbs' door with his tail between his legs. No more nights with Gibbs and no more Ziva. Just grief and loneliness.

Tony returned home and climbed into bed. He was not to the point of wearing her nightgown but he did put on the silk pajamas she was so fond of. He grabbed the pillow she always used from the closet. It had gone flat and bore stains from years of use. He did not care, he just wanted close. His mind flashed to all the nights she had slept in his arms, the night they made Tali, and many before.

The next morning he woke, dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, prepared a simple breakfast and made sure everything was in order for Tali to return home. He still had a couple hours before Vance was due to arrive. He logged onto his computer, went to Google maps, typed in the address of the Farm house. The image on his screen showed an empty field. He changed over to Google Earth. The grounds were no longer empty. A small house had been built. He saw a small girl dance around the yard a mother and father watched from the porch. He closed the laptop and wept for Ziva one last time.

* * *

 **A/N: Will Tony have clarity once again? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	17. Second Interview

As nice as his reprieve was, Tony was glad to have Tali back. Words could not express how deeply he had missed his baby girl during the past couple weeks. Now she was back and it was time for Tony to get back to reality. He had a date with Emily on Friday night and they would be taking the kids to an event on Saturday. In the meantime Tony had a job interview working security at an indoor playground. He had done well in the interview with the FBI but there were issues with his friendship with Fornell, among other things. At least with the playground job he could bring Tali with him.

The interview for the security job was far more relaxed than the FBI interview had been. There would be a drug test and background check. If all went according to plan Tony would have the job within two weeks.

Tony surveyed his surroundings. The office area sat in a small corner in the back of the building. There was a special foam on the wall for sound proofing. On the other walls were posters for different events a few plaques and certificates for different awards an achievements. On the desk were photographs of what Tony guessed were the managers children.

"Sorry I was arranging a birthday party." Josh announced entering the office.

"It's fine" Tony assured.

"So you turned down a job with the FBI." Josh commented.

"Yes I was promised a job where I could be involved with law enforcement but not be in a field position and have regular hours. Unfortunately one was directly under a close friend and the second position was not as flexible as I was lead to believe." Tony explained.

"You are a single father?" Josh asked.

"My daughter's mother. She was killed a couple of years ago." Tony explained.

"I was a single father. My first wife died from breast cancer. Our boys were four and eight back then. Did it on my own for eight years. Before meeting my current wife. We were surprised to be starting over as parents when our three were in high school but our twins are four and our baby just turned seven months." Josh explained.

"Tali is my one and only. I want more but I don't know." Tony explained.

Tony had a great feeling about this job, far better than he had after his interview with Fornell. Even though he had technically gotten that position. He hoped that he was right and that things would work out for him. He wanted desperately do finally start doing right by Tali. He had let her down for far too long.

Breena's car broke down that morning and Jimmy had ended up lending her his car. So she would not have to be dragging Tori around in public transportation all day. It seemed like a good idea until Jimmy realized he had left his blood sugar meter at home. Breena was in the middle of a funeral and Jimmy did not want to ride a bus home, get his meter, and then ride the bus back to NCIS. Tony was the only person he knew who was home during the day. He hated to do it but this was necessary. He dialed Tony's number and prayed this gesture would not cause too much trouble.

"Hello?"

"Tony it's me, Jimmy."

"What's up, Palmer?"

"I hate to bother you but I left my meter at home. Could you do me a huge favor and bring it down to NCIS?"

"Where is it?"

"It should be on the side table by the key bowl."

"I will be there as soon as I can."

"You sure you are up for NCIS?"

"It's no trouble."

In truth NCIS was the last place Tony wanted to be but Jimmy had always been so helpful to him, and he did have to pick up some paperwork from Vance. He loaded Tali into the car, drove to Jimmy's place, picked up the meter, and then headed over to NCIS. He prayed this would be the last time he was in that building. As strange as that sounded he just wanted to leave that part of his life behind him. He didn't have any trouble going through security and in the elevator down to autopsy. He passed Ducky but their only exchange was the doctor informing him that Jimmy was in their office.

"Thanks a lot." Jimmy said as Tony handed him the meter.

"It was no problem. I have to pick up some paperwork anyway." Tony explained.

"I at least want to pay you for gas." Jimmy insisted.

"Like I said I had to come anyway. This way Vance doesn't have to come to my place." Tony explained.

"Maybe I can treat you to lunch when I get my car back?" Jimmy offered.

"Lunch sounds good." Tony agreed.

The next step was far less pleasant. Out of habit Tony pressed the button for the squad-room. His stomach turned to knots as the elevator door slid open. He desperately pressed the button to close the doors but somebody was waiting. Just his luck it was Craig and Bishop. Vance had told them that if they wanted to date they had to be on separate teams working opposite shifts and were not allowed alone together if they had to be in the building at the same time. Of course they were not listening to him.

"What are you doing here?" Craig demanded.

"I have to see Vance." Tony replied.

"So do we." Bishop replied.

"I just have to pick up some paperwork." Tony explained.

"We are going to make an appeal to stay on the same team." Craig explained.

"That is an HR issue and besides it never works." Tony replied.

"We all know you were with Ziva a lot." Bishop spat.

"I was but we were. We were never serious enough to appeal." Tony explained.

"So you took advantage of her lovely." Craig scoffed.

* * *

 **A/N: It's clear Craig is the leader of this attack on Tony. What happens next? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	18. Later

Tony tried not to let his little run in with Craig and Bishop get him down. Really it wasn't that bad. Craig just wanted a fight, Tony started to give in but backed off. It did no good to fight with them. They just wanted to see him stumble and admit that he was the bad guy. Maybe he hadn't been entirely professional in his relationship with Ziva but she was just as bad as he was. Both parties were at fault in that mess. In the end all it gave him was heartbreak. He had Tali but he didn't know her for two years and probably never would have if Ziva had lived. Then again he could have made more of an attempt to get in touch. One half assed text wasn't exactly a valiant attempt at winning back her heart. It was a half assed text when he was drunk and horny. He fucked up a lot before Tali came. He was terrified of Tali one day meeting a boy like him. He tried every day to change but sometimes he still found himself making rude remarks or cat calling woman on the street. He was actually glad Tali was a girl. At least he didn't risk passing that asinine behavior onto the next generation.

After NCIS Tony and Tali met Emily and the boys at the park. It was a spur of the moment trip but they both needed it. Emily had finished her book and would soon go on a small tour to promote the piece. It amazed Tony to think how quickly this could happen. He was beyond proud of his fiancee for her accomplishment. He wished to say he could do the same but he doubted he could get his works published in a junior high literary magazine.

"When's the big day?" Tony asked.

"Not til June actually. The twenty third I believe." Emily replied.

"But you finished and it was perfect." Tony commented recalling the manuscript he had read.

"I have to pick a cover photo and go over a few other details. It could be done sooner but with the boys it is easier to delay." Emily explained.

"How does it feel to have written a book?" Tony asked.

"Great I always wanted to be an author. Originally I was going to write teen angst but anything I came out with just seemed like bad fan-fiction of whatever was in at the time. Emily explained.

"I am sure that's a lie." Tony chuckled.

"It's not but my publisher said it's actually hard to write if you want original. Any idiot can take Harry Potter but turn it into Gay cancer stricken werewolves in Space or whatever their doing now days. Being original takes more talent than I have. Non fiction is easy. It's like keeping a journal." Emily explained.

"My journal is just a bunch of drawings of genitals and whatever girl I found attractive that week." Tony recalled.

"That week? What is that supposed to mean? Am I just flavor of the month?" Emily questioned.

"It was for a college English course." Tony clarified.

"I bet your professor loved that." Emily laughed.

"Well he was about three hundred years old and almost completely blind. One time he called my crude sketch of a nipple the most brilliant piece he had read in his entire tenure." Tony recalled.

"Must have been some nipple." Emily laughed.

"Self portrait" Tony snickered.

"Tony DiNozzo you are a character!" Emily squealed.

"Maybe you could write fiction about me?" Tony suggested.

"I'd probably get sued by Thom E Gemicy for copyright infringement!" Emily jibbed.

"Don't ever say that name!" Tony snapped.

"I'm sorry. I only read his first book. You just remind me a little of Tommy. Only much more mature and respectful." Emily explained.

"Emily I...I am Tommy." Tony confessed.

"We all identify with fictional characters." Emily commented.

"No Emily Thom E Gemcity. He's or he was McGee. He wrote the books about NCIS. About us. I am Tommy." Tony explained.

"Did you at least get compensated?" Emily asked.

"No he just wrote about us. It used to be funny but now. Now I don't know why it just hurts." Tony explained.

"Because he wrote you as a bully." Emily commented.

"I was a bully back then. I guess I deserve this." Tony sighed.

"Nobody deserves what they did to you." Emily sighed.

Emily was not the first person outside of NCIS, Tony had told about Thom E Gemcity. She was the first person who believed him. Most people laughed at him. Others called him a liar among other things. One woman even threw a drink in his face and accused him of slander. Emily believed him and even better she felt sorry for him. Tony was not seeking sympathy. He probably was more Tommy than he cared to admit but it was still nice to have somebody on his side.

Tony and Tali returned home to find that a transformer had blown and power was out for the whole block. According to his neighbor it wouldn't be back on for at least another hour. It was already five and Tony had nothing he could just serve for dinner. Not wanting to sit around waiting to see and ending up having to order out anyway. He put Tali back in her car seat and headed off in search of dinner. They ended up swinging by a fast food joint. Not the healthiest option but definitely the easiest. He ordered a kids meal with apple slices and chocolate milk for Tali and a double cheeseburger with a side salad for him. He ended up just getting water as his drink. They drove home and sure enough power had been restored. Tony laughed at the irony as he walked with Tali inside. As he walked a car crept down the street. The driver rolled down the windows and caulked a gun. Tony did not notice anything was amiss until it was too late. Three shots were fired one got his attention. He shoved Tali inside and turned. Second shot lodged into his chest and the final bullet hit him in the head. He fell to the ground bleeding and alone.

* * *

 **A/N: Will Tony survive? Who was the shooter? New chapter will be up soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	19. Shot

Jared was at basketball practice and Kayla was at her tutoring job, Leon was enjoying a rare afternoon off with a nap. Napping was the first real sign he was getting older. When he first became director he could do fifty meetings in a day and still cheer on Jared's soccer scrimmages all night. Now he had to down a thermos of coffee just to be awake in the evening. He was lucky to get a nap in today. Maybe he would have energy to spend time with the children later.

When his phone first started ringing he thought it was just a crazy dream. Until the ringing was stabbing at his ears like a knife. A feeling of panic washed over. He always hated when the kids were out. It didn't help the girl Kayla had ridden with made Ziva look like an old grandmother behind the wheel. He glanced at his still ringing phone. It was Tony's house phone. Why would Tony be calling? He started to brush it off but Tony wasn't one to make unnecessary calls.

"Hello? Tony?"

"Abba's dead!"

"WHAT?!"

"Abba's dead."

"What? What happened?"

"He's dead outside the house. I can't open the door. There's blood everywhere."

"Tali do you know how to call 911?"

"They said I needed a grown up. Yours was the first I found."

"I'll be right there."

Terror surged through the director's body. He prayed that Tali was wrong. She had said she couldn't get out the door. He prayed that Tony was not dead. Maybe Tony had simply fallen and was unable to move. Being unconscious or unable to move could prove to have serious effects but at least he would be alive.

Leon did not even change out of the sweats he had tossed on upon coming home early. He just put on a pair of slip on shoes and raced out of the house, speeding down the street's towards Tony's house. He arrived in time to see the flashing lights of an ambulance speed off in the opposite direction. The ambulance's lights were on and it was hauling ass. Tony was alive but barely. Leon had to park two houses down as to not interfere with the scene. He raced down the side walk and threw himself under the police tape.

"Sir you can't be here." An officer barked.

"Leon Vance! Director of NCIS!" Vance barked flashing his badge.

"This is not NCIS jurisdiction." The officer insisted.

"That man was one of my agents of nearly two decades. That little girl is his daughter and I was the one she called." Vance explained.

"Is this true?" Another officer asked Tali.

"Yes" Tali sniffed.

The coming moments were a blur of terror and pain. One of the officers helped him get Tali's car seat into the back of his SUV. They loaded Tali into the car and he hauled ass towards the hospital. Upon arriving to the hospital the moments were filled with pacing around the waiting room making calls. First to Emily, then to Jimmy, and last to Fornell. Jimmy was first to arrive. As Tobias could not drive yet and he had to wait for Emily to get off work. The other Emily had to get the boys with a sitter before she could come to the hospital. Meanwhile Tali sobbed and asked questions that Leon could not answer.

Craig's heart raced upon seeing the BREAKING NEWS alert flash across the screen. He prayed he was wrong but as soon as the reporter began to speak he knew he was hosed. The story was a former NCIS agent found shot outside of his home. Tony was in critical condition at Bethesda. He was alive but he was shot in the head. God willing he wouldn't be able to speak. According to the report Tali initially believed her father was dead. Terror surged through again. How much had the little brat seen?

Bishop tossed her boyfriend's gun in the furnace of their apartment building and raced upstairs to get her story straight. They had been together all afternoon. He had lost his job and she had taken off early to take him out for a little comfort. She had begged him just to slip a a few peanuts into Tali's snack. This was bad. Very, very bad.

Gibbs locked the front door and the basement door. He parked his car around back. He knew they would come talk to him. He knew they would know he had proposed the idea of silencing Tony. He really hadn't meant anything like this. Not shooting Tony on his door step. There was plenty that could have been done that didn't scream for trouble. Thing had gotten out of hand.

Fresh bile rose in McGee's throat. Delilah had asked him about the news. He instantly began to vomit and cry. This was bad, very bad. How could they be this stupid. Tim had been angry with Tony for not even trying to come to his rescue but most of this was Gibbs and Craig. They had him convinced that the months of torture were Tony's fault and Tony's alone. He wished he had just got on that stupid plane and left Gibbs to deal with his pride on his own. He wished he had done something right.

Back at the hospital Vance was bouncing Tali on his knee. He had been wanting some Tali time but not like this. Not with her Abba in emergency surgery. Not because some psycho felt it was OK to just go and shoot Tony. Not while they waited for a police officer to come and ask Tali about what she had seen. Of course the director had a pretty good idea of who had done the deed but ideas weren't evidence.

"Hello Tali, I am Officer Kingston. I have a few questions to ask you." Officer Kingston explained.

"OK" Tali replied.

"Do you want to answer my questions out loud or draw a picture of what you saw?" Officer Kingston asked.

"Out loud" Tali replied.

"That is very brave for a girl your age." Officer Kingston commented.

"She's a brave kid." Vance replied.

"Who are you to her again?" Officer Kingston asked.

"A friend of her dad's. Her soon to be step mom is on the way but she can't get a sitter." Vance explained.

"Very well" Officer Kingston replied.

"Are we going to start?" Tali asked.

"Yes now you have to answer honestly. If you don't know tell me that. Don't make up details. You will not get in trouble for not knowing exactly what happened." Officer Kingston explained.

"OK" Tali replied.

"Were you outside when your Abba got hurt?" Officer Kingston asked.

"No he put me inside and was going back for the dinner." Tali explained.

"So how did you know he was hurt? Did you see something out the window or did you try to open the door and notice his body then?" Officer Kingston asked.

"I heard a noise and looked out the window. Something hit Abba and he fell down." Tali explained.

"Did you see what hit your Abba?" Officer Kingston asked.

"No it was small and fast. Like the acorns." Tali explained.

"Acorns? Officer Kingston asked.

"Some kids in my day care got in trouble for having an acorn war. I got hit on the ear." Tali explained.

"Did you see where the acorn came from?" Officer Kingston asked.

"The road. From a car. Do grown ups have acorn wars? Will I go to jail if I throw them again?" Tali asked.

"Well you won't go to jail but you can go to time out and that's worse. I mean you get to watch TV in jail." Officer Kingston joked.

"Don't make it sound good." Vance laughed.

"Probably true. Just trying to lighten the mood. Tali in truth your Abba was shot and he is hurt bad. Did you see the gun or a car?" Officer Kingston asked.

"It was a red car. With a yellow door." Tali recalled.

Vance felt sick. The car sounded like Craig's. He'd been in an accident and the only door that fit happened to be yellow. Of course he had no proof but it was another sign pointing to Craig. Officer Kingston asked Tali a few more questions and spoke with Tony's nurse before returning to the station. Vance sat with Tali and waited.

"I am sorry it took so long. My mom had to drive out to watch the boys. I didn't want to bring them to the hospital. I mean I didn't know how anything would be." Emily apologized racing into the room.

"It's OK, Tali just got done speaking to an officer. Now we are just waiting for Tony to get out of surgery." Vance explained.

"How is he?" Emily asked.

"Bullet to the chest and head. He's critical but hanging on." Vance explained.

Another two hours passed and Vance became extremely concerned. Emily was on the verge of tears and Tali did not understand. Calls were pouring in people wanting to know Tony's condition. The director had already told off ZNN and two local news affiliates who were vying for the first official update on Tony's condition. Finally the doors opened and a doctor shuffled into the room. Covered in blood and exhausted.

"Family of Tony DiNozzo?" Dr. Miller called.

"That's us." Emily replied.

"How is he?" Vance asked.

"Lucky extremely lucky. The bullet to the head was only superficial. He is going to have a nasty scar and the hair probably won't grow back on that side. He's facing at least a small percentage of hearing loss but he can learn to cope." Dr. Miller explained.

"What about the chest?" Emily asked.

"The bullet narrowly missed everything. As of now our main concern is pneumonia. He has been placed in a drug induced coma and he will be in ICU for at least forty eight hours. He will not be awake until we feel he is stable enough to come around and will be in recovery for at least a couple hours. I suggest you go home and get some rest. Come back tomorrow. He will be more up for visitors. We will call if there is any change." Dr. Miller explained.

"I can't leave him." Emily sniffed.

"I'll take the boys. You just stay here." Vance insisted.

* * *

 **A/N: Next chapter will be the last. Will update soon. Thanks for reading and please review.**


	20. Just Like A Movie

Anytime Tali recalled her childhood, she couldn't help but think how it felt more like a movie than real life. That sentiment was driven home by a particularly strict English teacher in middle school. The assignment was to write a non fiction story about your family. Due to a few other issues Tali had blocked most of that year out. What she did remember was that Mrs. G was a huge Thom E Gencity fan and refused to believe that he had committed the crimes McGee had. The alter ego had some how been exposed in the trial. An event Tali was too young to recall. Anyway Tony and Emily went down to the school and had a little chat with Mrs. G. Normally the school would have transferred Tali to another class but this was the only AP English class for seventh grade. Lucky for Tali Emily made enough off of her second book that the family was able to return to France. Something Tony had been working towards since the trial. Emily wrote two more books and all but one were made into movies. Tony made enough off the trial to retire.

Craig was sentenced to life in prison for attempted murder on a federal agent. Bishop got fifty years for accessory. She had a chance for parole at thirty but given her attitude it was unlikely parole wold be granted. McGee got ten years but was paroled at five for good behavior. He regretted his crimes and was working to get his life back. Delilah had remarried by the time he got out and he only saw the twins a handful of times before they turned eighteen.

Abby didn't have enough involvement to face criminal charges but she'd done enough to be terminated from NCIS. She eventually got a job with a small forensics lab. It was a pretty sweet gig actually but it did end up being a wake up call. She was just Abby there she wasn't the golden girl she had been at NCIS. She matured but the damage was done to her reputation.

Like Abby, Ducky did not have enough against him to be charged. Even if he did he was an old man and it was unlikely he'd have been sentences. He earned a forced retirement. He died in a nursing home shortly before McGee's release. Jimmy and Breena had tired to repair the relationship when the doctor was diagnosed with dementia but things were never the same.

Gibbs took the cowards way out. He hung himself from his boat shortly after he learned that Craig, Bishop, and McGee were facing criminal charges. The note he left painted him as a martyr, claiming he was suffering extreme PTSD. Given all he had endured in his life that was plausible but given the timing it was clear death was better than consequences for his crimes.

Vance left NCIS shortly after the incident. He let Kayla finish her Senior year and then moved with Jared back to Chicago where he took a job teaching at the Navy College. After Jared graduated he retired from the college and joined a fifty plus boxing league. It was a wild move but he had toed a certain line his entire adult life. Refusing to become a statistic. When his body didn't allow him to box any longer he moved down to Miami. Where he ended up coaching special needs children in boxing. It was supposed to be a short gig filling in for a friend of his while he was on vacation but ended up being a way to pass the days.

Jimmy left NCIS almost immediately and went to work for Breena's dad. Ed retired a year later and left the mortuary to Jimmy and Breena. They went on to have seven children two biological and five adoptions. The mortuary thrived under Jimmy and Tori was planning to take it over with two of her brothers Eddie and Sal. That would happen as soon as Tori graduated from college. Once Tori had taken over the business and the youngest Palmer, Valarie graduated high school. Jimmy and Breena would retire to Paris and spend their final days with their dear friends the DiNozzo's.

Tali had no idea what prompted her to return to the US. She had no real friends there. After seeing what her father endured. It was hard for her to trust anybody enough to make close friends. She was in touch with Tori Palmer and a few other kids from her days in America but she didn't consider any of them friends. She did a semester at UCLA and fell in love with California. She ended up returning to France and taking a job teaching English at a local high school. Until one day she'd just had enough. She cashed in her savings and relocated to California. She wrote the treatment for her father's story as a joke. She just wanted to live in Los Angeles but all her roommates were trying to make it big. Well one of the girls didn't see it as a joke and sent it to a production company. Tali was humiliated and sure she'd be made a laughing stock. Instead the company loved it. Before long a deal had been struck and "The Betrayal of Agent DiNardo" was making it's red carpet debut.

Tony DiNozzo never imagined he would be at the Oscars. An even more ridiculous fantasy was his daughter being a nominee. "The Betrayal Of Agent DiNardo" was nominated in five categories. Best Picture, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, Best writing.

"The Betrayal of Agent DiNardo" won in every category. In her acceptance speech Tali thanked her father and invited him to join her on stage.

Of course a night of glitz and glamour did not make Tony's pain worth it. What it did do was restore his lost faith in humanity. There were still good people in the world and his daughter was one of the best.

* * *

 **A/N: Well that's it. If I haven't already I am going to change the name to The Betrayal of Agent DiNardo. Thanks to Jackie Leigh for crediting me in Tiny DiNozzo. Thanks to all who read, reviewed, favorited, and followed. Leave one last review.**


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